Talk:HMS Renard (1909)/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Nominator: Simongraham (talk · contribs) 05:48, 13 April 2024 (UTC)

Reviewer: Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk · contribs) 15:17, 16 April 2024 (UTC)

Will get to this shortly. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 15:17, 16 April 2024 (UTC)

Prelim

• No duplicated links in the same section
• Article is stable
• Image correctly licensed
• Earwig reports copyvio unlikely

Status query

Pickersgill-Cunliffe, Simongraham, where does this nomination stand? It's been over a month since this review was opened, but there hasn't been any action on it since the day it opened. What will it take to get this review moving again? BlueMoonset (talk) 00:18, 18 May 2024 (UTC)

I've got some time off work coming up soon and will be getting to this then. I promise I haven't forgotten about this, despite what the evidence suggests! Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 05:00, 18 May 2024 (UTC)

Lede and infobox

• Suggest "(later G-class)"
  • Amended.
• Link Portsmouth
  • Linked.
• "Egpyt" sp
  • Corrected.
• "undetaking" sp
  • Corrected.
• Trailing zero in the infobox should be removed (16 ft 6 in (5 m))
  • Removed.

Design and development

• "as part of the 1908–1909 shipbuilding programme...for the Royal Navy"
  • Added
• Link bridge
  • linked.
• "This reduced costs" previous sentence structure suggests that it was the bridge alterations that reduced costs
  • Reversed the order.
• "deck space was lessened"?
  • Reworded.
• Link Cammell Laird
  • Linked.
• "as the G-class"
  • Added.

Construction and career

• Link launched
  • linked.
• "The ship was the sixth of the name to serve in the Royal Navy" She was the tenth, not the sixth. See Manning, T. D.; Walker, C. F. (1959). British Warship Names. London: Putnam. p. 369. OCLC 213798232., which also notes the origin of the name to be the captured French ship Renard in 1780.
  • Excellent spot. Amended with an additional information about the names of both ships.
• Link commissioned
  • linked.
• Link Portsmouth
  • linked.
• Do we know the date of commissioning?
  • Added.
• "towed her sister ship Scorpion"
  • Added.
• "enard was transferred, along with the rest of the class..." awkward sentencing here makes it unclear when the transfer happened
  • Clarified.
• You link to Alexandra in the lede and main text. Do you mean Alexandria?
  • Yes.
• "achieved achieved" dup
  • Removed.
• "However, the ship also saw other duties,"
  • Removed.
• "For example, on 24 July"
  • Removed.
• "For example, on 20 January"
  • Removed.
• "After the Armistice that ended the war" give the date here
  • Added.
• "The Nore" > "the Nore"
  • Amended,
• Not sure what note A has to do with Renard, as her class wasn't so renamed?
  • Removed.

References

• The two Corbett references are not used
  • Oops. These are now added.
• References look good AGF for print sources.

@Simongraham: That's all I have for now, apologies for the delay. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 16:41, 23 May 2024 (UTC)

@Pickersgill-Cunliffe: No problem. I believe all the edits are now done. simongraham (talk) 02:37, 24 May 2024 (UTC)